Requesting Support, Making Rules and Saying No

It can be exciting to start your own business and it can be very scary as well.  There are many people who are willing to help you get a great start.  For myself, here are some things I think you need to think and talk about with your partner, family and friends before you take that gigantic leap of faith into the entrepreneur field. 

To my mind the single most important aspect is having your partners support.  The second is having your families and friends support.  This is no time to be hesitant about your needs – tell them plainly they will need to help with everything from cooking meals, doing laundry, running errands to stuffing envelopes, and going to the post office with everything subject to change and based on demand.  Request actual examples of “willing to do this and that” and not vague promises – and write them down.  You may have to hold their feet to the fire some day! 

Can you create WAH rules and stick with them even if they make you very unpopular at times with your clients and your neighbors?  A very important rule is “just because I am at home doesn’t mean you can drop by whenever you like”.  Post your working hours on your business door – even if you have to make a new sign every single day based on work and family needs.  Politely but firmly inform and request your clients and family not to “run by, drop off, and be in the neighborhood of” without calling first. Tell them you love them but no exceptions!  Be prepared to stand firm at the door if they show up unannounced.   

Create a family calendar and let your family members know that there is minimum of 48-hour notice required for all school and social events.  If you are not notified in advance it is not going to happen regardless of the reason.  Your child’s Room Mother might think you are the root of all evil but your client will be ever so happy you were able to meet that difficult deadline!  Your family will be quick to get events on the calendar after their first failure! 

Practice saying no.  Or you can say, “thank you for thinking of me but this is not a good time for me right now”.  Or “I am sorry, but I cannot take on anymore right now”.  Don’t feel bad, don’t feel guilty and try hard not to cave in because they are pro’s at making others feel selfish because you cannot do this one, tiny thing for your children (and trust me there is nothing tiny about 48 cupcakes!).    

Never, ever, under any circumstances promise to do something without checking your appointment book/blackberry/or calendar.  Do not rely upon your memory because this would be the one time it is faulty.   It is a lot easier to say let me get back to you than to promise to do a project and then find out you are already committed elsewhere.  You know you would rather kill yourself then go back and tell the client you can’t do it as promised.  Every time you give your word to a client it’s a do or die situation.   

You must schedule no less two hours and no more than four hours for yourself each week.  You pick the date, time, and place but it cannot be doing anything for anyone but you.  At the end of that time you must feel refreshed, relaxed, and downright good!  You must fill yourself up before you can share yourself so completely with the others in your world.  You are so worth it!   
 
 

Posted:Thursday, February 07, 2008